I know what is true... This is not my home - I'm just on a journey here walking towards Home.
During recent days, however, I find myself longing for a home. A factor driving this to the heart today is my current battle with the flu. I miss my overstuffed sage-green couch, my dark brown leather chair, my plush off-white rug, the coffee with cream colored walls of my former living room and yes, my own bed. I miss my good friends living a stone's throw away and the ability to reach out to them. And, I just miss the familiarity of being known.
Whenever this question of home arises, I find my mind wandering toward the unknown future that awaits me. At once it is hard to wait and easy to trust. I can't imagine what the outcome will be, so I've resigned (in a healthy way), to allowing the days to take their course. Whatever will be, will, well, be.
This said, the want remains and as I wrestle with this virus, I tussle with my longing for a home.
2 comments:
oh sicky poo. Jessica, i miss you a ton, and i miss your couch too. it is in storage and would not be very fun to sit on right now would it. i am looking forward to your visit, and i must say, the leaves are just barely starting to burst, i think they will be in very full bloom when you get here. i am feeling so much like you right now, and may i just say... you have taken a very big step toward whatever is next, by throwing yourself into the unknown. i love you.
Miss you, too!! Sorry we have yet to connect via the phone. The flu sure took it out of me. It'll be sooo fun to see you soon! Will try to call you before then though. Can't wait that long! :)
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