The sadness I've processed here about friendship this year has lead me to a fresh point of understanding recently. The people who regularly choose to live life with me, those who want to know my story and walk with me are my actual friends. And, the same is true for me with others.
I've decided it's no longer important to be distracted by those I thought were my close friends and the disappointment I feel about the way they don't choose me. Instead, I'm realizing how key it is for me to look around my life and notice those who ARE choosing in. These are my true friends. I have the privilege to celebrate this reality and continue to move forward, releasing my expectations of the other people by acknowledging that though they are in my life in a way, they aren't the people I'd hope they would be to me (and I to them). AND, it's okay.
No longer do I need to live in the tension I feel in what I have hoped for (because honestly, I don't feel the hope there lately). I can release and bless them in their lives and friendships with others while taking joy in those who do choose me. It's a good reality for me to embrace right now as I move through this transition and into the good things God has for me. I don't have to take anything away from them, nor do I have to live in the sadness I've experienced from regularly being overlooked and left out.
I think this is another path to freedom in my life right now. I pray I walk it with grace and kindness and love. It's good to see my choice in it, so I can take responsibility and walk freely and lightly.
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