A Very Merry Christmas

Leading up to Christmas this year, I found myself ever-busy with plans for our winter conference and trying to get all done before flying home to be with my family. Two weeks ago, my Dad called telling me that my maternal grandmother had passed away. Plans changed and I flew to the West Coast for her funeral. I still feel that I haven't taken adequate time to sit and reflect on this loss. Though the reality hits me in unexpected moments and I experience a mixture of emotions... Tremendous sadness and great joy.

My grandmother loved Jesus and faithfully walked with him though her years in Russia/Ukraine, in Germany, into Austria, across the world in South America and then through the remainder of her life spent in the United States. Her story is quite remarkable and maybe I'll share more about her someday. I rejoice that she is with Jesus today - what a way to celebrate his birthday! She is experiencing the LIVING hope that he came to bring humankind.

To me, it's a special Christmas. Without Jesus, what would I have to celebrate? His life represents the hope I am able to have for the future as I recognize that it's not simply about the things that I see, but the unseen... the hope of Heaven and all that comes as a result... reconciliation, forgiveness of my sin, and new life! My grandmother is experiencing this firsthand today and I rejoice in the midst of my grief that she is free from the suffering and brokenness of our world. She is with Jesus. What a very Merry Christmas!

Happy House

There are moments in my life when I realize, "I have a good life!" I wish they happened with more frequency (albeit, I am a very positive person), but sometimes I fail to realize the actual joy that exists in the midst of my routine. Tonight, I had one of those moments.

I just returned home from a friends house where we were reviewing our Christmas photo shoot pics (admittedly, a little strange to me still); walking into my apartment, I felt a surge of happiness. I don't know where it came from (well, I could, should and do acknowledge the Lord... every good and perfect gift...), but I felt peaceful and grateful. I walked into my room to change into more comfy clothes - it's cold outside and I'm still adjusting. On my way to the kitchen to make tea, I appreciated the painted walls - colors that I love and chose and painted with friends and roommates - I smiled at the living room - it's so stinkin' inviting!!! - my eyes glanced around at furniture I adore and took time to collect and well, I just felt happy!...

All of this made me think about our recently celebrated holiday - Thanksgiving. On the actual day, I awoke feeling under the weather as I had for a week or so prior. I knew in my heart that I had things I was thankful for, but somehow that day, I wasn't able to express it in the truest of senses. I think that's why tonight struck me and the urge to blog overcame me. I am just SO grateful for my life in this moment and I think that's worth writing about and celebrating.

A few weeks ago, sitting with a friend who is struggling, I remember telling her that sometimes we need other people to look into our lives and tell us what's good because at times, we aren't capable of seeing one iota of good for ourselves. Tonight, I can clearly SEE the goodness and my heart feels invigorated. The simple things that make my life mine. Remembering that there is purpose and meaning and hope and joy... I have such a good life!

Wow. Am I grateful!

My Life in Pictures

My inbox is overflowing and my brain is too full of other things to blog. That said, here's a recap of my life in recent times with the help of some pictures...


Life at Fenway is always fun... Especially when our Boston Red Sox go on to win the World Series a month later.


The Jessica's out and about in O-town during our Conference Guild meetings.


Part of my team on Spectacle Island enjoying a different perspective on the city during our Worldwide Day of Prayer.


A visit to our upstate New York teams finds us in Syracuse receiving gifts from the team there. Go Orange!

Catching up in the Rockies. Reunions these days come in the form of friends' weddings.


The groom, Alex, with groomsmen, friends and former house mates, Paul & Peter.


Two of my favorite friends!

The groom and his gorgeous bridge on their special day! Congratulations Alex & Cass!...

Sox sweep the Rockies to win the 2007 World Series. Here's some shots of the crowd on parade day. This is two blocks from my office. Loving life in Beantown.

And, here's my favorite player... Well, at least a tribute to him. Big Pappy, I want to be your friend someday!


Jason Varitek taking his own home video of the crowd.


Fans taking photos with phones & cameras. Welcome to 2007. So weird.


ARod, the people of Boston are wondering, how did you like your free taco?


Papalbaum doing his dance for the crowd. Hilarious.

A night at the Opera. Thanks for putting this together, Kim! La Boheme... Beautiful.

Two of my favorite Northeast women! Loving the opportunity to dress up and head out for a night on the town.

There you have it. Life is good. Hopefully, more soon...

Happy Thanksgiving!

First Snow of the CO Season (Well, for me anyway)

The view from the end of my parents driveway last Sunday. Covered street sign, white sky, white fields. All in October. The day before it was 70+ degrees... It was fun to be home for a little Colorado weather!

Getting It

I am becoming convinced of something in my spiritual life. The reason I, we, often choose to walk in darkness is because we fail to understand the love of God for us. We do not grasp on a heart level that Paul's prayer for us is not only a nice notion to consider, but truth that we need to live in light of daily:

"Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. 18 And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. 19 May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God." -- Ephesians 3:17-19

God's desire for us is completion. He wants to satisfy our every need and desire, yet we run from it. We long for it, yet it terrifies us. We want to experience wholeness and redemption and freedom, yet we flee from him. Why? When he is the Source of Life, Creator, Healer, Redeemer, Righteous One, Lover of our Souls; He is the King...

I am grieved by the choices I make in my life that contradict the trueness of his love for me. In the same way, for friends that "opt out" of their relationship with him because they have suffered or because they don't believe that they are strong enough to walk faithfully. The truth is, none of us are able to live the Christian life on our own. We need him! We need the power of his Spirit to guide and direct, lead us, change us and provide us with the ability to walk in the light. Paul reminds us of the folly of walking in our own strength:

"Oh, foolish Galatians! Who has cast an evil spell on you? For the meaning of Jesus Christ’s death was made as clear to you as if you had seen a picture of his death on the cross. 2 Let me ask you this one question: Did you receive the Holy Spirit by obeying the law of Moses? Of course not! You received the Spirit because you believed the message you heard about Christ. 3 How foolish can you be? After starting your Christian lives in the Spirit, why are you now trying to become perfect by your own human effort? 4 Have you experienced^[a] so much for nothing? Surely it was not in vain, was it?" -- Galatians 3:1-4

God so desires that we experience his love for us, love him and share that love with others. How can we walk with him when we think it's about us -- our circumstances, our needs, our desires? Don't get me wrong, God cares deeply about where we are and where we have been, yet he longs for us to know him, to be free from the things that bind us so that we might know his love and walk in light of it. Our lives are transformed as we do this and so are the lives of those around us.

Today I've been reflecting on the lives of people I care for tremendously. In thinking through choices they are making it reminded me of the way I run from God and I am deeply saddened by this reality. He is such a merciful, loving Savior. His love is great and he is so faithful to us even when we aren't faithful to him. How can I run from such an incredible Lord and Friend? How can they? I just feel such a sense of compassion towards the hardness of heart that exists in my life and that of others sometimes. We miss the point. He loves us. We can stand firmly in that love, secure and unwavering, because it's truth.

It is the love that changes our lives.

The Most Important Work

I've just completed the most important work I could have done today. Moments ago, our regional team gathered to pray as a part of our 40 day prayer and fasting focus that began today and ends on October 10th. We are trusting God to open doors like never before for the Gospel to go out on campuses in our region and across the globe.

It occurred to me while we prayed that I was accomplishing more in those 30 minutes than in my entire day of "to-do's." The reality is, however, I typically forget that God hears my prayers and desires to answer as I humbly approach him. I forget that prayer is powerful and that God acts as a result of my prayers.

I'm encouraged by the way God wants me to stand on behalf of others through prayer and fasting. Isaiah 58 is a great place to look to understand his heart. And, I'm excited for the things he has in store as our ministry links arms together to pray and fast with expectant hope that God will act.

Lord, change us. Enable us to humbly walk with you and intercede on the behalf of others that they might know your Son, Jesus. May we see spiritual revival on campuses around the world as we spend time devoted to this most important work. Amen.

The Overcomer

Wednesday morning found me on the T on my way to the office. I'm slowly finding my way back into my routine here in Boston and, to be honest, it hasn't been that easy. Thankfully, I have an amazing job and the people I work with care for me... I am "easing" into life and work. While on the T, I was reading in the Gospel of John and came to the end of chapter 16 where Jesus says to his disciples, "But take heart, because I have overcome the world."

He had just covered the work of the Spirit - telling the disciples that he was going to leave, but sharing the necessity of this - then the Spirit could come. He wanted them to have peace in knowing that the plan was bigger than what they saw (or would see). And then, he told them to take heart... He had overcome the world. They could serve, love and obey him unhindered.

For me, this hit home. I so appreciate that God knows what I need and provides for it. He looks beyond the circumstance, sees the big picture and tells me, "Jess, take heart, because I've overcome the world." He knows what is ahead, where I've come from and what is going on now. He "gets" it. He understands the brokenness around me and in me.

I'm coming to understand the greater reality that this is a large part of why he moved me to Boston. He wants me to want more of him; not just the things he offers or what he provides for me (including my salvation), but simply, wanting him. It's encouraging for me to reflect on this right now as I transition back and trust him with my life here on the east coast.

Farewell Colorado

Three months have passed since I've seen the Atlantic and, more specifically, Boston. I spent a portion of the weekend in Evergreen for the wedding festivities and took one last picture of my beloved Rockies before departing. Tomorrow I head back to my east coast home and life. I have mixed feelings about it, but God has done much in my heart this summer and brought me hope for my next steps there.

To be honest, it just seems a bit surreal to go back now. I wonder how it will be to return to the place He has called me. I've grown accustomed to Colorado (admittedly, this isn't hard to do) and will have to re-adjust to the city. Once again I leave people I love, a place I love and a life I love to follow the Lord. This time, however, I get to return to a familiar home, a dear community of friends and work that I know I'm called to which makes the "re-entry" easier. I think my hope and prayer in all of this is that I don't lose sight of where He has brought me this summer -- it was with great purpose and a place of greater depth -- and that I continue to walk in step with Him knowing that He will meet me where He has called me.

So, for now and once again, farewell Colorado...

Congratulations Kate & Trent!

I met Kate at CU her freshmen year. God has moved in and through her life in so many ways over the past few years. Not only has she invested in women here in America, but also in Russia and Spain. The scope of her influence is wide. And, in the process of sharing our lives with one another, we became great friends. It was such a blessing to stand with her on her wedding day (and, of course, in the days, weeks, months and years to come!) and celebrate God's gift to her... Trent becoming her husband and she, becoming his wife. God gives good gifts. Here is the happy and beautiful couple... Many congratulations and prayers for an amazing marriage and journey with the Lord in this new season! You are loved...

#4

Pictured above is the fourth, yes fourth, wedding bouquet I've caught in my lifetime. Honestly, for the past five or so years, I've taken a "break" from this portion of the wedding festivities I've participated in and this is the reason... I tend to catch the bouquet. And, as evidenced last night at my friend Kate's wedding, I still have the knack for it. Typically, I duck out or pretend not to hear the single female "call," but yesterday, I felt compelled to take part since I was part of the "Wedding Team" (thank you Franklin for that new phrase in my vocab) and because I love Kate. Here's to another wedding and another bouquet. :)

Why I Love Boulder...

My Non-Christian Christian Friend

Recently, I was hanging out with a couple friends and catching up on life. I don't know how we got on the topic, (isn't that how it always happens?) but at one point Shaun began telling us about his experience at church in North Carolina. He has been attending the Saturday evening service at a small church and upon a recent visit, the woman at the door greeted him by asking, "Oh, aren't you Shaun...?" She actually used his last name, too. He hadn't been attending this church for very long and really didn't know anyone.

Of course, we chimed in and said, "Well, did you fill out a comment card?" (We were thinking it might not have been that weird.)

He explained that, yes, he had filled out a comment card, but more importantly, when she said this to him, it occurred to him that he was probably the only new person. Interesting.

So, he continued telling us that he took his seat and the service commenced. Throughout the message, Shaun noticed that the Pastor was frequently speaking directly to him, especially when he was talking about those who might be investigating the Christian faith.

Let's pause here. Shaun is a believer. He grew up in a Christian home, was heavily involved with CCC in college, loves the Lord and has compassion for those who don't know Jesus.

So, every few minutes the Pastor would look at Shaun and speak about knowing Jesus. At the end of the message, the Pastor indicated that he was going to pray a prayer and that if anyone (again, looking at Shaun) was interested in knowing Jesus, he/she could pray with him.

At that point, Shaun looked at his watch and realized he must leave to meet a friend with whom he'd made dinner plans. Yep, right in the middle of the prayer he stood up and left, knowing that they probably thought he "wasn't ready" to engage in a relationship with Jesus.

I can just imagine the prayers of the church staff... "Lord, please bring Shaun back to church and Lord, please help him to come to know you." Hopefully Shaun will introduce himself to the Pastor sometime soon...

Kinko's: Full of Kinks

Yesterday I was helping my friend, Kate with her wedding programs. We did the design, proofed the file and headed to our neighborhood Kinko's to get them printed. Seems like a fairly normal thing to do, yes? It was a debacle.

When we arrived, we asked the staff to print the programs, fold and staple them together. Something we thought Kinko's did for customers. Instead of doing so, they directed us to the computer stations to print our own programs indicating that they would fold and staple them once we were finished with the printing.

We then asked where we might print the program from Publisher. They directed us to a computer. Kate inserted her credit card and was being charged online time, only to discover that Publisher was not available on this particular system. We mentioned this and the staff informed us that Publisher was not on that computer. Very helpful.

Once we figured out the computer stuff (there is much more to the story at this point, but I'm skipping ahead to save time), we indicated that we wanted them printed digitally (not copies of the original copy). They informed us that it would be around $2.00/each, but that the machine they would use to do so was broken. After over an hour in the store, we left without any programs.

We left. We went to Xpedx and purchased paper and then headed to the UPS Store and opened the file. They printed the programs on our paper, double-sided, folded and stapled (the machine did all of the work!). It took a little over 30 minutes. They charged us $0.16/each. We saved over $300. Remarkable.

Staff Conference Snippet

Steph, Megan, Ally, Joanna, Me

CM2007 (stateside) and our US Staff Conference just ended. Certainly, there is much to process, but I lack time and energy at present. It is hard to believe how quickly the summer is passing! Life up north was wonderfully exhausting these past few weeks... Well, maybe minus the dining hall and non-air-conditioned dorm experience...


A friend asked yesterday, "What was your favorite part of the conference this year?" My response mirrored those of the other three women to which the question was presented... People!!


It was such a joy to spend a couple weeks with some of my best friends on the planet. It reminded me of the love I have for the Campus Crusade staff community. It's like a big family and there were many people to connect with, share life and process all of the things that God is doing in, through and around us. I love that I get to walk with Jesus and serve Him with such amazing people. I so appreciated the q-time with these cherished women... Love you Al, Ally, Angie, Em, Erin, Joanna, Megan! And, so happy to have brief catch up sessions with you Andrea, Becky, Christine, Claire, Kim, Jilliebean, Shelley, Tawny!!!... We need more time!... I'm SO blessed by the Lord because you're my friends.

It's So Hard to Say Goodbye...

VSP is over... Well, over for the staff. The students remain there trusting God to move in their lives and through their lives. It's an exciting time for them and I can't wait to see all that He does.

Yesterday, I drove away from our staff retreat in Steamboat and cried most of the way to Silverthorne. Saying goodbye has never been my strong suit - especially when it is meaningful to me personally. I tend to get quiet and lose my words even as I feel loss deeply. (If you know me, you know this is a big deal! :)) I would say that God restored part of my heart that has been "missing" the past couple of years in Boston this summer. He allowed me to open up, enjoy Him, enjoy others and ultimately, let people in to see who I am again.

As I continue to process it, I know that I've withheld part of myself in Boston. Our staff team shared highlights from the summer on Saturday night, and I said (probably not for the first time) that I hadn't laughed so much in two years. It was so freeing, refreshing, encouraging, yet it didn't lack challenge. The Lord brought up some things in my life - patterns that I have in relationships and how I view Him - and I realized something important... I've grown. God has brought a greater sense of balance and hope to my heart in those places and I saw it tangibly at play this summer. And, this person that I've "rediscovered" needs to go back to Boston and live it out there now.

Today, of course, I am heartbroken to be away from these friends that became so dear to me in such a short period of time. I am sad that we're no longer living life together in Vail and that we've all gone our separate ways. This was my favorite project team to date and I so wish that we could have had more time. And, isn't that the case in our lives when we experience something so good? I reminded myself this morning that God created us for this kind 0f community - that was His plan! - and why should I be surprised when I grieve its loss.

I want to say thank you... To the Lord, of course for His tremendous love and provision in my life and to our team for loving, enjoying, encouraging, praying for, believing the best about, serving and challenging me. Amy, Beth, Brett, Chance, Darci, Demarick, Jenade, Jo, Liz, Luke, Mike and Phil, I will miss working with you day in and out and am hoping and praying for His very best in your lives in the coming days, weeks, months... You are dear to me and I am so grateful for you!

And, as an aside, you are always welcome in Boston! ... For vacation or feel free to move there. :)

And, the Rest of the Story

Fast week 2007. We challenged our students and staff team to take a corporate fast based out of Isaiah 58. There, we find an explanation of fasting that pleases God. The most substantial lesson I learned as we prepared for this fast and studied this passage was the outward focus of the fast itself. It's for others. No doubt that we experience blessing in the midst of a fast, yet God desires for us to sacrifice on behalf of others -- to break the binds of wickedness, undo heavy burdens, free the oppressed, break every yoke, clothe the naked, feed the hungry, bring those in who have no shelter.

I was amazed at the lesson God taught me as I entered into this fast. Although it wasn't my first fast, it was my favorite. I appreciated the opportunity to pray for the people of the Vail Valley and invite the Lord to do the things listed in Isaiah 58 in their lives. In fact, as the week went on, our students saw first doors opening for kingdom conversations at work. It was exciting to see God move in the lives of our students, staff and residents of the Valley.

My week took an unexpected turn three days into the fast (Wednesday). A dear friend, Kate came to visit me and we spent some time walking around Vail Village and catching up. Just the day before, I shared with the staff team that I felt at peace, refreshed and encouraged in the midst of the fast. I was tired, but ultimately, I felt great. My friend and I made our way to Starbucks in the Village to grab a drink and as soon as I paid at the register, I looked around the store and everything looked really strange. I began to experience nausea and thought I might throw up. I made my way to the restroom and almost passed out while waiting in line.

Several minutes later, I composed myself and headed back out to meet Kate. I sat down at the table and felt weaker than I'd ever been in my life. I told her that I should probably eat something, but couldn't even do that. Finding myself back in the restroom, I began experiencing tremendous pain in my abdomen. I spent a while in there and finally made my way back into the cafe. At this point, I told Kate that I felt that I needed the paramedics and that we should call the project Operations Director for help.

Shortly thereafter, spread out on a comfy chair with my legs up on another, our Ops guy arrived and then the paramedics. I was in such pain that I kept my eyes closed to avoid taking in anything else that I'd need to process - I needed to focus on breathing through the pain. I remember hearing someone say, "Is that our girl?" Then, he was kneeling near me asking if there was any possibility of pregnancy... Nope... Eyes still closed. After a few minutes and hearing more people enter the store, I opened my eyes to see Ryan from the Bachelorette kneeling beside me! He was the one asking the questions and checking my vitals! He was very kind, as were most of the other paramedics and Vail fire personnel.

Essentially, I told them that I had been fasting - they didn't look pleased, but I had been taking good care of myself with plenty of water (between 96 and 128 oz. per day). They took me to the hospital saying that I was dehydrated, but interestingly enough, didn't think enough of it to give me an IV. On the way out of Starbucks, I discovered the Fire Chief offering his arm and helping me to the ambulance. He told me that my blood pressure was 90/60. No wonder I couldn't move! :)

At the hospital, they ran some tests, discovered some things and ordered a CT Scan. Nothing looked abnormal, so they sent me home with some short instructions. It was a most adventurous day. What is most interesting about all of it to me is the fear I experienced in the midst of the pain and low blood pressure. I remember praying, "Lord, I'm so scared, I need you to help me. I can't do this." I've never been so afraid in my life.

Later, I thought back to a dream I had on Sunday night at the onset of the fast. Without going into detail, the dream left me awake in the middle of the night experiencing a tremendous sense of fear. I knew when I came to my senses that this was a spiritual dream and that this fear was not from God. As I thought about the circumstances that transpired in Starbucks, I knew that this was no ordinary situation. For one, my condition changed as if someone had flipped on a light switch. One moment I was totally fine, the next I was about to pass out. The fear associated with what happened caused me to consider that this situation was, much like my dream, very spiritual.

At the end of the day, I recognized God's goodness in caring for me in the midst of the fear. I knew that he allowed this to happen for a reason and that our corporate fast would not be well received by the enemy. It's not often that I recognize spiritual warfare, but there was and is not a better explanation. In and through it all, I experienced the Lord's presence. And, we have continued to see God's work as a result of this fast. My prayer has been and continues to be that God would truly free those who are bound in the Valley. That many people would know the freedom that comes from a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and, that they would experience literal healing, freedom and provision in their lives.

What does it look like for me to come alongside those who are hurting? I will continue to ask this question. I trust that God will continue to show me. It is a blessing to know him...

Winding Down

Hard to believe it, but our time (as staff) in Vail is just about to end. It has been the most rewarding, encouraging and refreshing few weeks that I have experienced in quite a while. I feel so grateful to God for the gift he has given me in this summer assignment.

The past few weeks have been full since my last post. We've hiked, rafted, sought to connect with people in the Valley, fasted (story to come in another post), experienced great connection through our men's/women's weekend, shared our faith, prayed and truly, we have seen God move.

In fact, I am taking a minute to type while we wait for our adventure race teams to come back to "home base" - today we've sent students and staff out to do about 30 miles of swimming, hiking, biking and taking part in mental challenges as well. I was along the course for a while and am taking a minute to breathe while they work their way back home. I do like my job. :)

Here are some photos of recent times with these new friends...

Me and Darci out in Vail Village

Jenade, Chance, Me & Darci out in the Village

The women of VSP 2007 - head of the Gore Creek Trail

Candy & Me on the Gore Creek Trail - she's such a sweet student!

Shannon, Lyndsey, Angela and Jo at the Whailer's Concert
Jenade, Chance and Me at the Whailer's Concert

Vail!

(Me, Chance, Luke & Jenade in Vail Village)

What could be better than spending the summer (at least a good portion of it) in Vail, Colorado with a team of tremendous staff, loads of fun students with a purpose greater than all of us combined? Nothing, quite honestly, in my opinion. :) I'm having an incredible time and although I'm quite busy, the change has felt more like vacation than work. That's a good thing.

And, I remember... I love my job.

This summer, we're engaging with the people in the Vail Valley in some unique ways. We're trusting God to work in our lives and through our lives to bless the community, grow us in our faith and open doors for us to talk about the Kingdom. Our focus and prayer is that we would be a humble group of people that really seek to have the attitude of Christ (Philippians 2:5). We so desire to serve and love on those around us. We are asking God to connect us with people who are on a spiritual journey (all people, really) so we can come alongside them in that process and we're hoping and praying that many people will meet Jesus and understand, on a heart level, the love of God through him in their lives today.

I'm so blessed and thankful for this time away from the routine of the city to encounter the Lord, enjoy his creation (people and the gorgeous Rockies), and spend some time really listening to his voice this summer. How awesome to be back home, training these staff and students and enjoying the Lord.

Some highlights:

Teva Games - We spent the afternoon talking with people in Vail about life and spirituality.



The Samples - I am old, officially. When I shared my enthusiasm with our students that The Samples would be playing in Vail Village during the Teva Games, I received blank stares in response. I, however, enjoyed part of the show and returned to my "youth" for 45 minutes. :)



Snow! - Yep, you read that correctly! June 7th & 8th, we awoke to find snow flying outside of our condo windows. Yesterday, during a hike with our staff team, we couldn't believe our eyes as part of the mountains were hidden behind a snowstorm! It was awesome and we were a little chilly. Pictures to come later. My batteries died.

Typical Colorado.

In New England people have told me, "You don't like the weather, wait a couple of hours..." In Colorado, we tend to say, "You don't like the weather, wait a couple of minutes..." :) And well, here we are on May 24th and it is SNOWING. Yep, the snow is sticking, too. Need I remind those reading that it's almost June? I mean, summer is just a few weeks away, right?

We went from sun to rain to sleet to snow today. I can't imagine what the high country will be like next week when I arrive in Vail (it snowed there yesterday). There is always a weather related adventure in my beloved home state. Typical Colorado.

Fun Friends

Kimberg, Anster, Bottster, SKF

Recently, we had a surprise birthday celebration for our friend, Christina. Here are a couple of the fun friends at the party. I am so blessed to have such friends in Boston! Note to self and friends in CG: when lighting candles for the surprise birthday cake, wait until you're certain that the birthday girl is close at hand... One of many good lessons I continue to learn in my life! :)

A Recap of Weeks Gone By... Final Installment

I mentioned our "new event" we held in April in my previous post. Last month, we gathered the women in the Northeast together for a women's conference. A time to connect with the Lord and one another... A time, prayerfully, to be refreshed and to rest. In the midst of bronchitis, the Lord met me in some sweet ways. One thing I took away from the time was this image:


When I arrived home from our conference, I sifted the internet for this photograph. The title is "Woman with Seven Children" and it was taken during the Great Depression. Our speaker used this image in one of her talks and it moved me. She asked us what we saw...

I saw a brave woman. Someone who had been through so much and seemed to have a tender determination to make it. She seemed strong. Her children clung to her for support and she sat looking into the distance, perhaps the future, with her face forward.

I LOVE this image. It has continued to minister to my heart and at times, I'm not sure why. I continue to think about her. What did she go through during those times? What did she hope for in the future? How did she do it?

It's not often that an image or piece of art so consumes my thoughts and my heart, but this one did. I'm going to enjoy the journey of processing what this image means to me. How I love it!

A Recap of Weeks Gone By... Part II

Conferences, Conferences, Conferences... This was my life in April. I had three, virtually back-to-back, events. In the wee hours of the morning in which our first event, our new event, was to begin, I awoke and knew that I had bronchitis. Boy, that was a morning! I was on the Cape, went back and forth between two health-care facilities hoping to find a doctor that would prescribe antibiotics. By 10:15 AM I was back and running our staff meeting. At 2:30 PM our conferees began to arrived and as they say in the 'Biz, "The show must go on" and it did.

A week later, the last two events came and went and I was ready to see my friends! I'm not sure if I've mentioned recently how much I love Boston, but here's a new reason:

Art In Bloom

A few weeks ago, three of my favorite girlfriends and I headed to the Museum of Fine Arts (MFA) for their annual "Art in Bloom" exhibit. Every year, area garden clubs are invited to interpret selected pieces in the museum and interpret them using flowers, plants and as we discovered on-site, other interesting objects like... artichokes! :)

It was a great way to spend a beautiful Sunday afternoon in Boston. Pictured to the left, me and my friend, Alexis.



Here are some of my favorite pieces from the exhibit:

A Recap of Weeks Gone By... Part I

There was tragedy in Virginia. At times, I find it so difficult to embrace the reality of the brokenness in the world. An optimist at heart, I can't help but hope that things get better. However, I know that the only solution to our brokenness resides in the person of Jesus Christ who came and lived a blameless life, died on a cross and rose from the dead three days later sealing humankind's freedom from sin and death forever. It is through a thriving, love relationship with Jesus that we can know God and have hope in the midst of our brokenness. That is what encourages me as I process the evil that exists in our world. I am so sad for the families of all of the victims. My prayers are with everyone affected by this tragedy.

Almost May...

I have much to catch up on here on the ol' blog. Hopefully I'll get to more of it this week. April was the most eventful month since December and life is good. Today I'm thankful for good friends (Happy Birthday, C!) and the promise of summer... It's just around the corner. There's a lot to look forward to in the coming days and months. I'm heading out west for a while and enjoying my last week here in Beantown... More in the next couple of days...

Small, Significant Faith

Monday around 7 PM I was on my way home from the office, riding the T and reading a letter. We passed Central Square and I put the letter aside and pulled out my mini Bible - it's a good time to catch up on what the Lord is saying :) - and started to read a Psalm. The girl sitting a couple seats away on my left leaned over and said, "Are you a Christian?"

Stop there. I'm in Boston, remember? This doesn't happen very often and I wasn't sure what was coming next.

I replied, "Yes, I am a Christian." She went on to say that she reads verses on the T, too. I asked if she was a Christian (you never know...) and she said that she was, but had walked away from God for a while and made some choices that didn't help her relationship with him. She went on to say that she was in the process of figuring that out and wanting to know him.

She asked me what I do for a living. Funny question. I bet she didn't expect my response.

"Actually, I work with students, well, more in operations these days, but with a Christian student ministry," I shared. I asked if she worked in the city. "No, I'm a student." And, she clarified that she goes to Harvard. Wow... Harvard. It was the next stop on the T; and, thinking time was short, I asked if she liked it.

"No."

I haven't heard that response from a Harvard student before. We went on to talk about faith and how walking with Jesus is a process... a journey. We talked about his love and how he wants us to know him and makes that possible. And then she shared something that I've been thinking about for days...

"Actually, I have been praying that God would allow me to meet Christians in Boston. And I keep meeting Christians."

You might wonder what was so significant about this statement. I did. And it continues to stay with me. Here is this sweet third-year student who is trying to figure out what this relationship with God looks like again and although her faith is small, it's significant.

God is answering her prayers!

Now, that is something.

What a challenge and encouragement to me in my faith. God answers prayers. She is seeing the tangible evidence of this in her life and it's faith-building. It reminded me how I long to see God do this in my own life. The question I face is this: Am I willing to ask? Am I willing to believe that he will answer? Am I willing to wait on his timing?

I so appreciate the Lord allowing me to be apart of the answer to her prayer and, even moreso, am grateful for the lesson. Faith, even small faith, is significant. God hears and he responds.

Tourney Time!

Ahhh, March! The weather is warming (at least for the moment), the Charles' ice has melted, trees are beginning to bud and spring is on its way. I'm loving the new daylight savings time! Longer days are here again... Although, after a recent business trip, I am a bit on the slow side having transitioned three hours instead of two. But, life is good because the Tourney is finally here!!!

Have you filled out your bracket today?

Only about an hour twenty to go... My stomach always goes into knots because I tend to care about how my bracket stands in comparison to others. But really, what fun would the Tourney be without a little anxiety? :) I love it.

This time of year always reminds me of a favorite teacher who passed away early in my college career. Mr. Main introduced me to the Men's Tourney in high school and to Kentucky who has since become "my" team – it’s funny how certain things stay with you. During my freshmen year in college, I couldn't wait to visit his family during my spring break and show him my bracket. Before I made it to their house that week, he suddenly passed away. Every year at this time, those memories resurface and I'm thankful that I had the chance to know him and his family.

So, here's to you Mr. Main! And, here's to one of my annual highlights, the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament. I can't wait to see what happens this year...

A Barista Unlike Any Other

The other night I headed out to do a bit of grocery shopping. It was a lame Saturday night activity, but I returned the day before from a trip and spent the whole of the day engrossed in the 5th Harry Potter book. I cannot get enough!

Anyway, I went to TJ's and did my shopping and noticed a fabulous Starbucks next door. Wonderful! I did a little grocery shopping, put my stuff in my car, checked the time (8:35 PM) and saw that Starbucks was open until 9. Plenty of time to grab a little extra hot hot chocolate!

Well, upon walking in, one Barista was chatting with the only customer in the store and the other was sweeping. I proceeded to the counter and looked up at the drink menu (as if I was deciding what I wanted...). The Sweeper asked, "Did you want to order something?" I'm thinking, "Um, of course I do... Don't just walk into Starbucks for no reason." :)

From that moment on, the Barista proceeded to try and talk me out of my drink! What in the world! That was a new one, I mentioned. He told me the calorie content of the drink I ordered, asked me why I would come in so late, told me that I could go home and make hot chocolate (even encouraged me to go out and buy Nestle Quick!), etc. I told him that if I was such an inconvenience, I'd help him out by saving him time at the register ... He could give me the drink for free.

And, that's exactly what happened.

What a rare experience at Starbucks. Highly, highly amusing. That Barista gave me a smile.

Let Down

I must admit that I'm a bit troubled today by the lack of consideration one person can show another. This morning, I headed out the door for church and while standing on a lump of frozen snow (it really won't melt!) waiting for cars to pass, looked across the street at my car and noticed that something seemed out of order. I thought, "No, the sun must be hitting it in such and such a way making it appear that there is a rather large dent on my front fender."

Alas, it was not the sun. I surveyed the damage and realized that the person who caused it failed to leave a note. I then called the police department, my insurance company and then, of course, my parents. I needed someone to sympathize with me - although, I must say the people at the police department and the insurance agency were surprisingly pleasant.

I got to church after I finished my phone calls and my pastor preached on the eighth commandment: You shall not steal. Boy, did this sermon hit home for me today. The person that hit my car was unwilling to pay for the damages that they caused to my property. I am going to have to pay my insurance deductible to have my car repaired and the money I spend doing that will not be able to go where it was meant, and really, needs to go. It is an unfortunate situation and honestly, I'm angry. This unknown person has basically stolen money from me.

Most of me wants justice today. I want the person to come forward or I want someone to catch them. I want them to pay for the damages.

Though, my dad reminded me that God ultimately knows who did this and that he will take care of me. That is comforting. I've been a bit introspective today, as well. I mean, this truth of "You shall not steal" applies as much to me as it does to the next person. While I'm angry with this unidentified person, I must remember that God has forgiven me for worse and I must forgive. I have to let it go.

It's not easy. Bothered would be a nice way of putting my emotions today. I know it's okay to move through this and feel what I feel, but I will also look forward to getting over it. After all, it's just a car, it's just money and life is too short to be that concerned by it.

I think the thing that really bothers me most, however, doesn't have to do with the car or the money. I cannot seem to wrap my mind around the fact that someone did this and did not take ownership of their mistake. That's what is really getting to me. And frankly, I feel let down by that person today. I guess I am still an eternal optimist that wants to believe that given the opportunity, people make the right choices. Admittedly, I am a bit naive in saying this - I know I am. And, I know that this is why the Gospel is so important and relevant today.

People are sinful and need forgiveness. We make mistakes, we let others down and on a much more important level, we are separated from the God who created and loves us as a result of our sin. I need the Gospel to penetrate my heart today to forgive. I am grateful that God gives me the opportunity to do this and let the damage done end with my car and my bank account.

A New Love! Harry Potter...

My journey in reading has finally landed me on the widely tread path of Harry Potter. What a series! I've just completed the fourth book, "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire." I know, I'm a laggard when it comes to this trend... And, I'm glad that I didn't miss it. I have found these books to be so imaginative and redemptive. The fourth in the series is my favorite thus far. I literally couldn't put it down!

One of my dearest friends has always expressed her love of the friendships in the story. I agree. It is so tremendous how Harry, Ron and Hermione live life together through the ups and downs of adolescence, not to mention, enduring incredible circumstances. I love the professors, love to hate some of them, think Dumbledore is amazing and wise - he gives people second chances, and find the adventure captiviating.

And, I'm moving on to No. 5 tomorrow. I can't wait to see what comes next...

Amazing Grace: The Movie

Yesterday I viewed a screening of "Amazing Grace," a film detailing the life of William Wilberforce and his plight to abolish slavery in the British Empire. The story was moving and inspiring. It caused me to consider how an ordinary person, passionate for a cause, can change the course of history. It was interesting to see the way John Newton's redemption (a former slave trader who repented and turned to Christ) was later used to build a strong argument against the slave trade, as well. His story starkly contrasts that of William Wilberforce, yet both men used their unique place in life to make a lasting impact. Two stories intertwined.

Prior to the screening, we learned that human trafficking is at an all time high today. Shocking news, when I really think about it. And, something to consider: Lord, what would you have me do with the passions you've given me and the position in which you've placed me?

Please see and support this film. www.amazinggracemovie.com

Looking Forward

Today I am reflecting on the fact that it's 2007. Happy New Year! Have I said that yet? Honestly, I've sort of forgotten that it has arrived and January is almost over now. That went fast.

I've been doing the usual: forgetting to write 2007 on checks and in documents (thank the Lord for Word though... it does this for me and I am better for it). I'm kind-of relieved to think about the New Year. There is much to look forward to and it's exciting to have a clean slate in certain senses (more on that in the near future).

In the technology arena, I'm moving up a notch... I purchased my first Treo today and I'm eagerly anticipating the day when it will arrive. I'm a little stunted in my technology growth, so I feel thankful for friends who will help me. I hear that my life will be better as a result of having it because I'll be able to sync my email, contacts, calendar and tasks -- the latter two were the selling points for me -- and all without the use of a cord (though, I really tried not to get one, but am glad to have been convinced otherwise). Awesome. I think I'll have fun waiving it around my laptop and seeing what happens. My friend assures me that I don't have to wave it, but I think it'll be more fun to do so. :)

Schedule demands have not necessarily eased, but the differences for the spring are allowing me to spend more time with friends and doing some things that I love. It is super encouraging to have time to spend with people again - hopefully I'll be a little more in tune with what's going on with others this spring. I'm reading Harry Potter - it's so good! I get to travel a little for work which is fun. Plus, I'm generally seeking to build margin into my schedule which is a tremendous growth point for me.

In recent news, I will spend the summer in my fabulous home state! I have accepted a leadership role on one of our renowned Summer Projects! God has blessed me with an opportunity to spend the summer in close quarters with students and staff in the gorgeous Rockies. Not only is this a treat for me personally, but I am thankful for the growth and development that the Lord is already causing in my life as a result of taking on this role. It's amazing how something like this can plunge a person into examining one's own life and cause an immediate dependence upon God. I feel completely incapable of leading in this capacity as I see my life from the front row. Yet, God is gracious to me and has entrusted me with this responsibility. I can't wait to see what He has in store!

So, all in all, 2007 is looking good and I'm looking forward to it. I think it's the optimist in me, but I think it's going to be the best year yet. I'll let you know in a few months time.

Tuning In

Last week I finally slowed down. After months of craziness I'd almost forgotten what it was like to have downtime, hang out with friends and think about my life. Since church on Sunday, I've thought a lot about the message I heard on rest.

It's funny how difficult it can be to truly rest. I, for one, find it quite challenging to do so. Part of it is that I really love to work. BUT, this past week I've begun to think about the things that bring life to my life. And, it has been good for me to consider, once again, that work isn't everything.

So, the question I've been asking myself is, "What is life-giving?" And, I've been finding that I have no clue what the answer is for me right now. Things that used to be refreshing feel cumbersome and I'm unsure of what to do next. I've reached the point (again) where I am so out of touch with what's going on inside of me that the day comes where it hits me like a ton of bricks... Something's wrong... I have to take time to tune in and figure out what I'm doing to myself and what I need.

This may sound messed up, but I believe that part of this process is really good. I need to seek the Lord and figure out what He wants to say to me and what He desires for me to do. Hearing from Him can sometimes be challenging though... Sad to say, but I think it’s because I've trained my ear to hear everything except His voice.

I am thankful in these times though. God is so good to meet me and speak into my life. I was reminded this week of what Jesus said in Matthew 11: 28-30 (The Message):

"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."

Amazing! He wants me to come away with Him to recover my life... He wants to show me how to take a real rest, but notice, life doesn't necessarily stop. A friend has recently asked this question often: "Are you resting?" He knows how busy I've been and my answer remained the same, "Trying to... Maybe in a few weeks." Looking back over these recent weeks, I can see what he was saying now. In the midst of life per normal, was I finding true rest? How is this possible? The passage has a clear answer: By coming to Jesus to recover my life; learning from Him and watching how He does it.

Jesus never forces this on me. He wants me to choose it. He isn't the one that is handing me the heavy load - I'm the one trying to prove myself, trying to move ahead, ignoring the significance of the difficult things, continuing to circulate in unhealthy habits, avoiding conflict, being hard on myself, failing to take time away from the busyness, the list goes on and on. He actually wants me to experience grace; He wants to free me from the heavy load.

It reminds me of the times I travel and need to take the T to and from the airport. My bag always seems heavier on the return trip and I always pray, "Lord, Please let the escalator be up and running!" On a recent trip, I reached my stop and sure enough, the escalators were out! Total bummer. I was walking toward the exit and begrudgingly preparing to lug my suitcase up those stairs feeling tired and a bit put out. I remember saying, "Lord, it would be so nice if someone would offer to help" yet mindful that I live in a city and this isn't always the reality. Just as I reached the base of the staircase, someone from behind said, "Jess, can I carry that for you?" One of my colleagues was on my heels and took the load from me! I was so relieved and very grateful. He even offered me a ride home!

Now, that wasn't a difficult decision for me to make. I was happy as a clam to hand my burden off to my friend and he desired to help me. Jesus does the same for me every single day, but I often tell Him that I'd rather do it myself. Why? I'm still trying to figure that one out. I long to live "freely and lightly," but I also avoid it. I choose to make life harder on myself and I'm grateful that Jesus is there, offering this incredible rest, calling me to tune-in and waiting for me to accept His offer.

I hope to say "Yes" a lot more in 2007 and, once again, discover the life-giving things He will show and provide for me in the midst of the craziness that is certain to come.